Grief is an emotional response to a significant loss. For some, that loss is the death of a loved one, the ending of a relationship or declining health. For others, it may be the loss of independence or the inability to pursue a lifelong dream. Although we understand it is a natural reaction to loss, the depth of our grief can make it feel as though we will never move beyond it.
Making the grieving process even more complex is that no two people grieve alike. There is no correct way of grieving or a clear path to follow. What might be helpful, however, are coping strategies for grief.
Effective coping mechanisms can provide relief from some of the more overwhelming feelings while allowing your own grief process to continue. Learning more about grief and more healthy ways of processing it may be beneficial.
Understanding Grief
Grief is the emotional response to losing someone or something you love. You can experience many powerful emotions, including sadness, anger, despair and disbelief when you grieve. It is also not uncommon for people to feel guilty, apprehensive about the future or ruminate about the past.
Grief does not just impact your emotional well-being but also your physical health. You may struggle with insomnia, appetite loss, and low energy -- among many other physical reactions.
It is important to know that grief and depression are not the same. Both can be characterized by feelings of hopelessness and sadness, but grief has a specific cause. However, prolonged grief can lead to depression. And an unaddressed grief response can result in complicated grief, which affects your ability to live your life normally.
How to Deal with loss OF A LOVED ONE: Coping Strategies for Grief
It is not easy to know how to deal with losing a loved one. You may be so overwhelmed with emotions that you do not know how to help yourself through the grief. These coping strategies may be helpful.
Participate in Grief Rituals
Even if you think doing so will make you sadder, taking part in rituals related to grief can assist in your grief process. For instance, attending a loved one’s memorial service or visiting the gravesite can help your mind process that your loved one has passed.
Express your grief as you prefer, but be mindful of unhelpful behaviors, like keeping a loved one’s room untouched long after the death. That can leave you stuck in the past and unable to move on.
Avoid Drastic Changes
Losing a loved one is one of the most difficult changes to your life you will ever experience. Making other significant changes as you process this loss may exacerbate its impact. Often people think they should do something different, like start a new job or even move. Waiting until you are further along in processing your grief will allow you to approach these decisions in a more balanced way.
Because you have experienced a dramatic change in your life, keeping the other things in your life as constant as possible can help you stay balanced. Making drastic changes can even be a way of avoiding dealing with the grief, which only prolongs its impact. Give yourself the time to fully grieve so that you can process the loss in a more health way.
Focus on Self-Care
As you grieve, you may find that you do not want to eat or that you cannot turn your mind off enough to sleep. Force yourself to eat healthy meals and find moments in the day to lie down and rest. Your body might be under a lot of stress and it needs fuel and time to recharge.
Treat yourself with kindness, too, as you would treat anyone else dealing with grief. Take breaks when you need them and do things that give you peace, like taking a long bath or watching a comfort movie.
Stay Active
You may not feel like exercising, but it is important that you do so. A walk around your block can be enough. Exercise releases endorphins which can lower stress. It is also one of the more important coping strategies for anxiety and depression, too, especially if you are dealing with mental health concerns that grief has intensified.
Try Mindfulness Exercises
Another important coping skill is being able to stay in the moment. Start by practicing mindfulness. Mindfulness encourages you to focus on what you see, taste, touch, hear, and smell in the present moment. These exercises allow you to slow your mind down, relieving anxiety.
Keep a Journal
Many find it helpful to keep a journal where you can express any feelings related to your grief. There is often relief to be found through venting and giving voice to your emotions.
The journal also allows you to get a sense of the progress you have made. You may think that your grief has not gotten any better, but looking back through your entries can show you the difference in your state of mind.
Journaling can be a powerful tool that gives you hope for how you might feel in the future. It offers a window into your healing process.
Connect With Others
Grief can tend to isolate you. You may feel that you do not want to upset others or that you will not contribute much to a conversation because you are not feeling like your normal self. However, it is important to maintain contact with others. Reach out to loved ones even if you do not feel like it.
You might also consider speaking with others who are going through similar issues. There are lots of support groups online and in person that can help you meet other people who are also grieving. You will see that you are not alone in what you are facing.
Speak With a Mental Health Professional
Sometimes, connecting with others may not be enough. If you have intense, prolonged sadness that overwhelms you with feelings of hopelessness and emptiness, you may benefit from working with a mental health professional who can help you process your grief in a healthy manner.
Allow Yourself to Heal
If you have lost a loved one or are experiencing loss of any kind, give yourself the time and the permission to heal. If you find it difficult to go through the process alone, reaching out to a mental health professional can be beneficial.
The mental health professionals of Wellness Links have the training and expertise to help you through your grief process.
Notes
de Lang, T. A., Buyukcan-Tetik, A., de Jong, P. J., Lancel, M., & Eisma, M. C. (2024). Trajectories of insomnia following bereavement. Sleep Medicine, 114, 159–166. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.sleep.2023.12.009
Godman, H. (2019, January 4). Grieving? Don’t overlook potential side effects - Harvard Health Blog. Harvard Health Blog. https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/grieving-dont-overlook-potential-side-effects-2019010415722
Zisook, S., & Shear, K. (2009). Grief and bereavement: what psychiatrists need to know. World Psychiatry: Official Journal of the World Psychiatric Association (WPA), 8(2), 67–74. https://doi.org/10.1002/j.2051-5545.2009.tb00217.x
American Psychological Association. (2014). https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/stress/2013/exercise. Www.apa.org; American Psychological Association. https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/stress/2013/exercise
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